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Thirty-two years of longing by Elizabeth from Vermont

Thirty-two years of seeking,

So many moons spent dreaming,

11,688 days, more or less, of wanting,

For the day to come,

To know the true nature,

To upgrade to higher Self,

And more recently, to extinguish the "me."

Hundreds of books of knowledge,

A few dozens of teachers and guides,

So many weeks of attending retreats and satsang,

Countless nights of crying and dreaming,

For the moment to arrive,

When freedom rings the bell,

For peace to take over the weight of time,

For the event of unconditional love to finally shine.

Two days of a last resort trip,

Three hours of scheduled sessions,

For my husband and me to meet,

One smiling face that talks about

No-nonsense clarity and infinity.

Then all the numbers got erased,

All the measurements made no sense,

I looked at my husband and finally saw him,

At the same time, he vanished with my mind.

He asked: "Has it always been this peaceful?"

Left speechless, I just looked trying to convey,

But words kept on getting muted,

I have no idea what eternity is, but maybe

It can be expressed by one genuine smile,

A sigh of relief, and a few tears of grief for

The one that never was but always is.

My husband piped in again, “How did he do it?”

I finally was able to answer and said, “He didn’t, but

maybe it was the DJ-ing and the dancing.”

We both laughed and cried, and what seemed like an

endless night, so clear and bright.

It has been almost a couple of weeks of unmistakable peace,

Memories of friendly Canadian borders and fluffy croissants,

An overflowing gratitude to the best dancer that I have

Ever seen and the most incredible DJ I have never heard of.

And every time my husband smiles, it reminds me of that night

When peace broke us wide open and when love fell in love with love

Over and over.

Thirty-two years might have never even happened, a distant dream, a faint memory,

Yet as remarkable as that long trek in the Appalachian Trail,

And all that I always have is this dance of peace from here to eternity.

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